


the Rating

by Darst-Llah (Darst002)



Category: Transformers - All Media Types
Genre: Gen, M/M, Oops
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-04
Updated: 2015-09-04
Packaged: 2018-04-19 00:21:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,244
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4725743
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Darst002/pseuds/Darst-Llah
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>What some cons have to do to get through the heads of other cons. No spoilers, duh<br/>Everything needs stucture. Even interfacing.</p><p>Dedicated to bibliotecaria.D in a poor attempt to mimick her style.</p>
            </blockquote>





	the Rating

Megatron's designation appeared on the _list_. Not the List as in the DJD List, see, the..._list_. As in roll-your-eyes-and-wiggle-your-eyebrows _list_.  
It had been four cycles and still no one knew the details. Logically, everyone kept guessing and checking the _list_ for updates every few breems. The unofficial social hub server that Soundwave kept running for the crew as a gesture of goodwill must be hot as a turbofox in heat by now. All that traffic. Eager to check if that had been a mistake. Nope. Still there.

As many things they picked up along the war, keeping track of the _list_ started off as a joke. History failed to memorize the con who first put up the _facing rating_. The server log probably held the answer, but even if Soundwave knew, he didn't disclose this data. Part of the allure of using the underground social hub was the top-notch anonymity that the Chief Communications Officer was set to maintain. So, no designations. No ranks. No cross-referencing connection points with con's current positions. Only the buzz, the vent section and - yeah - the facing rating.

It might have started out as a joke, but it was quickly recognized as a sound idea. If you're stuck with the same bunch of murderous trigger-happy slaggers - and most decepticons fit that profile, - for what seemed to be an eternity now, and you don't think committing to anyone is a good idea - and in most cases it isn't even outside the war, - you have little choice other than 'face around. Sooner or later, that's exactly what you're gonna do. And then - there come rumors. Because if there's one thing decepticons like nearly as much as beating slag out of autobots and occasionally each other, it's gossip. They don't need kissing to start telling.   
And if sometimes due to a tragic mistake in judgement or simply due to slaggers being slaggers stupid things happen.... oh boy. You are so screwed. Staring contests, grumbling, midnight clandestine beating the bolts out of "the abuser", mission fuck-ups, outright sabotage...murder. Whoever first decided to rate his one night stand partner and put it up in public must have been a genius. 

The one who got rated first was Swindle, if you have to ask. Thoroughly scandalized at the time and secretly proud now to be the first _rated_ "overall performance 7.2 of 8" Swindle, who was complemented for empathy and discretion and somewhat berated for talking too much in the process. Swindle became an extremely popular mech within a joor after his rating was posted in buzz.

Soundwave saw the opportunity and immediately set the rules - and a new section dedicated for _the list_. The rules were strict but they were also just. You could rate once for each encounter but no more than once a decacycle for one mech, even if you fragged him non-stop into the next Tuesday. Also, you cannot rate if there was no 'facing. Soundwave did not announce sanctions for breaking the rules, and unsurprisingly, the first one caught cheating and set as example was Starscream. The seeker just couldn't pass an opportunity to spite Megatron, could he?

Soundwave's reprise was harsh. Starscream's rating didn't even have a tiniest chance to get visible - it was removed the moment it was submitted. Soundwave's answer, however, stayed on for a full decacycle, written in red glowing glyphs: "No, Starscream, having your bolts beaten out of you by Lord Megatron doesn't count as interfacing even though you get off on it. And no, you cannot rate Lord Megatron as "obnoxiously arrogant" based on that. Your access is hereby suspended until further notice".

Oh boy. Had Starscream been furious. Thrown out of the server where all his armada hung out? Pointed at, called out, outright humiliated. Many, many cons got worst possible assignments when he heard them snicker behind his back - or imagined them snicker. Whether he planned to use the shaming rating to help him on his way to the throne or just did it in spite, it had been a big setback. It remains unknown what he had to offer Soundwave to gain his access back, but it had taken him nearly four decacycles to negotiate the ban lift. 

Some cons argued, that Soundwave's rating got updated about the time Starscream's ban disappeared, but that was just a rumor. Anyone could have rated the spy as "controlling and relentless", right?

Of course, there had been much guessing as to who submitted a particular rating, but it was soon clear that the cons in general interfaced a lot more than anyone assumed. And eventually some of the cons couldn't even be sure who gave them a particular rating. It did take some hassle to set up, but it became clear as the time passed that it had been effort well invested. The number of interface-induced feuds and spites decimated in a vorn.

By now the _list_ was as much the constant of decepticon infrastructure as the List.   
Everyone was on it. Even Blop was on it. Constructicons were on it. Seekers were all over it. Megatron wasn't. Until now.

And it's not as though cons actually believed their leader was above crossing wires or didn't have this charged drive, it's just... he was MEGATRON, you know? Cons lucky enough to gain his attention weren't stupid enough to dare rate him. And it wasn't just a question of strength or power - it's just... he was Megatron. Half of the army got off on just watching him fight and hearing him speak. You don't break down your idol into pros and cons.

Up until now.

Megatron's designation appeared on the _list_. And what was more important, it was rated seven. Of eight. With worst points for empathy. The Nemesis was buzzing with rumor and at the same time froze in fearful anticipation. Undoubtedly, Lord Megatron had learned about it by now. Bets had been placed on the most obvious assumption - Megatron would beat the bolts out of Starscream for it by the end of the fourth cycle. Skywarp took the bank by betting against it and calmly pocketed the shanix, dismissing angry shouts that he had used insider info. The trickster pointed out, that a) him knowing stuff was a known factor and the fools should have followed his bet, not opposed it and b) the fact that Starscream hadn't crossed wires with Megatron like at all didn't make him immune to a possible beating.

Even more surprising had been the fact that the rating was still up. Shouldn't have Soundwave removed it? I mean, were they even allowed to rate the leader's empathy? As bad? Wasn't that the point of being a leader - imposing your will on others? Mech, what the slag was on?!

***

Soundwave finished his report on internal rumors and moods in the faction and stood to attention. Megatron regarded him with an unreadable expression. 

\- Three? For empathy?!

\- Point: proven. No one had guessed.

\- But three?!For empathy?!

Soundwave shrugged.

\- You disobeyed my order, - the leader doomed over the spy, his voice a low growl.

Soundwave's frame gave out a tiny tremble, as he answered: Affirmative. Point: proven.

\- And you shall be punished... and after I'm done with you, you will erase it.

\- Update it.

\- What?!

\- I will update it, because then... you will have to punish me some more... my Lord.

Megatron blinked, froze for a second, then it dawned on him and he started laughing. "C'mere, you!"


End file.
